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Til I Got to Know You

When you listen to a song, which sticks out to you--the lyrics, or the beat/tune/melody?

I've always found it difficult to discern the meaning of songs (yet alone discern what people are even saying) when listening to music. I know this is very odd for someone my age, but I don't even listen to music. I like driving my car in silence, jogging without earbuds, and doing work without distractions. Sooooo... when I DO stumble across a song I actually like, it means a lot.

Here are the words to a song by Sanctus Real called "Til I Got to Know You"--it was played during one of the videos at Easter and I found out about it on a friend's blog afterwards..

I tried perfecting myself
Would You love me more without my mistakes?
I tried not to ask for Your help
'Cause I didn't want to scare You away

Yeah, I was always worried
I was gonna let You down
Oh, it felt like I was standing
In between the lost and found

'Til I got to know You, You
I was at a place when You found a way
To break through, it's true
I was just a skeptic 'til I got to know You, You

And it's hard accepting Your grace
In a world where nothing's free
For so long I was afraid
That You'd only see the worst in me

Yeah, I was always worried
You were gonna figure out
That I wasn't what You wanted
Wasn't worth being around

This song rings true to me because it captures the insecurities I have, not just as a human being relative to other human beings, but in my relationship with God too. I was always worried no one would want me if they REALLY knew who I was inside--I had heard that Jesus's love for me was unconditional and unchanging, but doubted it all inside.

It wasn't until I confessed word-by-word, image-by-image, e-v-e-r-y big aND little sin in my life that I was no longer a skeptic. God didn't shun me or reject me because of my mistakes or failures, but actually wanted me still. That honest time of repentance at the TC summit a year ago marked a breakthrough in understanding God's love for me. God help me to feel the depth of my sinfulness and be broken before you again..

Comments

Eric Yee said…
awesome song and awesome post! thanks for the share!

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