Live Out Loud

Don't you just hate it when you leave a meeting feeling unsettled or conflicted? It's not like there was a blatant question that was intentionally not discussed, but lack of clarity or next steps is one of the most frustrating feelings to live with. You spewed out everything on your mind, but are not sure what to make of it all. It's scary when you're entrusted with the power to make decisions. One thing I've been experiencing first-hand this month is that God is a God of peace. There were a handful of decisions that I had to make regarding the summer, my future, and relationships but I had to fight the temptation to just "do what I want". The ball was in my court, but I wanted to deflect the responsibility. I couldn't bear the unresolved feeling of being torn and conflicted, so I finally started asking. Jeremiah 29:13 says that if we seek God with all our hearts, we will find him. I told myself I wouldn't settle, wouldn't stop until

Last week I stumbled across my college résumé and discovered a foolish typo, repeated twice in the document. I was absolutely dumbfounded when I came across this error because I had spent HOURS revising this document in college --the fact that I missed this error not just once but twice made me wonder.. Why the heck did it take me three years to realize this? Truth is, I never asked for a second eye to proofread or provide feedback, because I felt like I knew what I was doing. I had spent hours reading guides and gone through rounds of revisions that I felt extremely confident, maybe even invincible. When I discovered my error however, I deeply regretted not asking for feedback earlier--and felt foolish for having such (faulty) confidence prior. My pride often hinders me from asking for input and hearing the truth. After a handful of experiences like this where my thinking or knowledge was proven to be faulty however, I am learning to embrace feedback. “Leaders who refus

What are some of your favorite websites? Do you ever find yourself spending more time on a website than you originally intended? I often catch myself spending more time on Wikipedia than I planned. I go there to read about one topic and end up reading about a handful more. A prime example: Alcoholics Anonymous  >> Addiction recovery groups >> Codependents Anonymous. This was a powerful part of how God revealed his personal love for me, at last year's !gnite conference . You can have a cloud full of high-quality web pages, but it doesn't mean much without the connection. Seems like the one thing people want as a website visitor, information seeker, and/or human being = connection I love this #FALLINGPLATES campaign because of the way it is able to relate the mystery of the gospel with everyday objects--this is marketing.

I was in a crowded school gymnasium when there were two older men coming after me. I didn't know what they wanted, but ran away into the sea of people to try to hide. In the gym, I saw a lot of familiar faces but didn't feel like I could share with any of them about how I was feeling. I felt so trapped unable to voice my fears and feelings, until I saw in the middle of the crowd a group of girls from my LIFEgroup. One, dressed in a blazer and skinny jeans, stood out to me and embraced me as I cried into her shoulder. Even in a room full of acquaintances and brothers & sisters in Christ, I only felt comfortable revealing my true self to one. I am insecure and filled with fear, but people don't think I am. Or at least I think that's what people think. Somewhere along the line I started building self-imposed expectations. I felt like I needed to live up to a certain standard just because of the college major I pursued, the company I work for, or my commitment

I like Joseph. In the midst of suffering, he didn't play the victim, and he didn't blame his brothers. He trusted that God would make him fruitful even in the land of his suffering, and offered up his gifts regardless of his circumstances. Who woulda thunk that an ordinary boy would be sold into slavery by his own family, discovered for his gifts while imprisoned, and elevated to manage a nation in the midst of a famine? I feel like Joseph sometimes. Source: The Brick Testament I was a punk who thought I was awesome. I used my gifts and strengths for self-promotion. I've talked/whispered in my sleep that I will take over the world (yes, it really happened). And yet in the midst of my inflated pride and self-centeredness, God gripped my heart to let go of my reign and put someone else at the center. I don't get it sometimes. I didn't seek God nor ask for God , but I guess that's the amazing thing. I didn't choose God, He found me and revealed Him

No one seems to like the s word, but sacrificing is an inescapable fact to life. Just like basic economics principles say, everything in life is a trade-off. You cannot gain something without losing another--there is an opportunity cost to everything, especially the causes, ideas, and relationships that are worthwhile. And Jesus' words aren't much different: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?" (Matthew 16:24-26) One lesson I learned from college ( insert grad night testimony here ) is how every momentary sacrifice I made was in fact no sacrifice at all. Momentary sacrifice seems so real, but when we set our eyes on what is unseen/eternal, we are able to move forward believing that the net gain will be positive. Truth is, a lif

When I first made the decision to stay here after I graduated, I thought I was doing something noble. Even though it wasn't an easy decision, I thought I was doing God some favor. It wasn't until 2012 when I went to Indonesia for a week-long medical missions trip that I realized: I'm actually not that great . I felt so insecure coming back to the US to say that it took $2400 of financial support, 36 hours of travel time, and a trip to the other side of the world JUST for me to realize that; but it was SO needed for me to finally bend my knee in utter brokenness. Coming back, I received this new perspective that the REAL reason why I had been asked to stay was more similar to the concept of remedial education. I was too stubborn, closed-off, and resistant to Jesus during my four years in undergrad, so I had to be held back. I'm so thankful I didn't just "do what I want" and leave, because I would have missed out on SO MANY lessons on integrity, rela

One thing that has been really special about my LIFEgroup this year is the critical mass of core members (yes pun intended) who not only show up to participate in things, but are superbly talented with different gifts. But truth is, natural ability will only take us so far. I learn best through failure, and that's what I welcomed for others--not with any evil intention, but because I've learned so much when exposed through failure. I spent much of this week in frustration but realize now that these are the very opportunities I asked for. Thankful that God and His people provide an abundance of second chances, no matter how much we mess up.

 "When I was a child I often had toothache, and I knew that if I went to my mother she would give me something which would deaden the pain for that night and let me get to sleep. But I did not go to my mother--at least not till the pain became very bad. I did not doubt she would give me the immediate relief I needed, but I did not go to my mother immediately because I knew she would also do something else--take me to the dentist. I could not get what I wanted out of her without getting something more, which I did not want. I wanted immediate relief from pain, but I could not get it without having my teeth set permanently right. Dozens of people go to our Lord Jesus to be cured of some particular sin which they are ashamed of... or which is obviously spoiling daily life. Well, He will cure it alright: but He will not stop there. That may be all you ask; but if once you call Him in, He will give you the full treatment. That is why He warned people to 'count the cost' befor