Live Out Loud

This week has been.. breathtakingly awesome. One atypical thing about my life right now is that even though I am a working adult, my schedule is significantly affected by those of college students (due to the ministry I'm investing in). With the semester coming to a close and the campus filled with family/friends visiting for graduation, many of the meetings I normally partake in after work have been cancelled. I wanted to steward this God-given free time (!) purposefully and this week has been just that! 1) Developing discipline Unfortunately over the past semester I've lost alot of the discipline and self-control I once had. I've been praying for discipline for a while but this week God has given me SO many chances to make new commitments for the year (and actually stick to them)! This is a great beginning to the "new year" that begins next weekend, and I'm hopeful that God will enable me to stay true to my commitments for the rest of the summer. 2) Being st

I've been really enjoying my time driving this week. The week started off freaking out about the warning light to check my tire pressure (and fill my gas tank), but after I took care of that I think I just had a greater appreciation of my car. Even though driving 90 miles/day is never ideal, I've come to (on occasion)appreciate my long commutes. Throughout the past eight months, my commutes have been awesome times for me to memorize verses, catch-up with Hyeri, or actually pray for the people on my dinky prayer card. That little vehicle has served as a sanctuary for me and sometimes even with other people. I distinctly remember a time last year when I had an emergency breakdown session with a friend in her car. We only ended up there because both of our apartments were at-the-time occupied--but man that time venting and praying in a confined vehicle was sweet. Even though I had previously been very adamant about not owning a car (why pay the fixed costs of car insurance, variab

Baptism services and Grad Night are my favorite events every year because we get to hear a plethora of stories, back-to-back-to-back. These stories leave me refreshed and encouraged because 9 times out of 10, I'm questioning, doubting, and wondering if it's worth living my life for God's glory (not my own). This first year out of school has not been any different. 90% of the time, I questioned why I was still in Michigan, why I was working in Detroit, why I spent so much time serving the church, and why I rarely had free time to myself. Of course the simple answer to why was: because God called me to do this. But that's all I had--a mere conviction, a promise that "as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are (God's) ways higher than (my) ways and (God's) thoughts than (my) thoughts" (Isa 55:9). I never planned or desired my life after college to be the way it looks now--if I had it my way, I'd be in downtown Chicago, working for a CPG company

Over three weeks since I last bit my nails--I can't believe it! They're starting to get long enough for me to use a nail clipper now though so figured I'd snipe a pic. One of my nails (on the other hand) started tempting me today so I ended up "peeling it" away instead of patiently waiting to use a real nail clipper at home today. I am so tempted to just do the same to the other nine nails now, particularly because I know I already "gave in" to one. GAH must resist.. Had the chance to check out Milano Bakery yesterday during lunch-time. Jan and I have been having monthly outings for lunch where we actually leave our cubicles and our buildings. The first time we did this was back in November when a Groupon deal prompted us to drive 6 minutes away from our building for lunch. This was a really epic moment because despite having worked in Detroit for 4-6 months prior, neither of us had EVER veered off the Ann Arbor to RenCen (and vice versa) route. In the

I used to think that anything I invested in church was irrelevant for the "real world." Whenever people would ask me what extra-curricular activities I'm involved with, I knew I was investing the most time into the local church--nearly every day of the week I was investing in my personal or others' spiritual lives. The killer was that despite how much I was investing, I felt like I couldn't justify its worth to a classmate or employer. I made sure to keep the "brand-name" internships and solid leadership positions on my resume, but never felt comfortable writing "Harvest Mission Community Church" on a mere 8.5x11 sheet of paper listing my professional qualifications. By the time I was applying for jobs senior year, I had no choice but to list HMCC on my resume--recruiters always inquired what I did my junior year summer, since there was no impressive internship employer to woo them over. Even though I tried SO HARD to relate my experience at Ce

One thing I really dropped the ball about this year is carrying some of my (bad) habits from student life into working life. Overall, I am a very meticulous person with careful attention to detail. When I was in college though, I realized there was just no need for me to THAT attentive to detail--after all, I was dealing with hypothetical case studies in class or a sentimental gift that was merely meant to bless. Initially when I did carry out things to the tee, my teammates either dismissed it as unnecessary, or the attention to detail was unrecognized, hence (in my mind) deeming it as something not worth the investment. So I graduated college without doing everything detail-by-detail, pretty lackadaisically, and in Korean terms, very "dul-lung". My grades didn't suffer much as a result of my half-hearted efforts, which also affirms the recent NYTimes Article about "Skating through B-School" :P I carried this "I don't really have to be THAT attentiv

One of my favorite aspects of Christ-centered community is the chance to hear other people's stories of God at work in their lives. I still remember Grad Night two years ago--even though I had attended every Grad Night, this one was special. That time Junior Year, I had made some difficult decisions to obey God and was questioning if it was worth it all. I went into the evening not expecting much, but when I sat through hours of graduates boasting about how God has been at work in the midst of all they went through, I couldn't help but agree that God was not only SO EVIDENTLY working in people's lives, but also how much it was WORTH IT to keep following Jesus. Even though I have a hard time getting in touch with my emotions, when the testimonies ended and I walked up to the graduates one-by-one to thank them for sharing their story, I ended up BURSTING into tears. I felt silly bawling in front of them, but I just couldn't believe I had been doubting the worthiness of li

When I think about how I made it through my years in Michigan, I know I couldn't have done it without community (side note: after shamelessly promoting our lifegroup video last year, I canNOT say the word community without singing it to the melody lol). A lot of changes came about when I started college--not only the idea of starting a new life in an unknown city, but my biological family had also transitioned to life in Korea, and I went through an extreme identity crisis as I was confronted with the gospel while living a duplicitous life. But through all the new things I was experiencing, there was always a sister or brother in my spiritual family who was encouraging me to keep trusting in our Lord JC. Without my peers, accountability partners, mentors, and spiritual role models, I am nearly confident that I would have fell away from the faith (especially in light of all the junk I had hidden away behind-the-scenes). My mom is in-town this week and today I had the chance to invi

Check out this cool site that I didn't make (and is not affiliated with HMCC): http://jesus-is.org/ In efforts to get people in Ann Arbor thinking about who Jesus is, I've been conducting one question surveys to get people's honest thoughts on what they think of Jesus. The first time I did this exercise was with my ministry team, and I was blown away that 1) people were very willing to fill in the blank in "Jesus is _____, 2) there were more believers than I expected, and 3) some people genuinely had NO IDEA who Jesus was to them personally. My lifegroup participated in this exercise last night, this time not only to gauge the spiritual climate of this campus, but also to get our fresh JESUS IS rave cards out into the city! The survey was an excellent, non-intimidating segway to promote our Easter Celebration to strangers, and I'm thankful I had the chance to do this with my LG. The responses I've received in the past varies from things like.. Jesus is ______:

Yesterday at church I went to say hello to Kathleen and her newborn daughter, Shana. After a few minutes Kathleen asked me if I wanted to hold Shana --before I could say no, she handed her over to me and started walking away to find her two other sons (lol). I've often enjoyed watching and admiring babies from a distance. Partly because holding such a precious and fragile baby in my arms seemed like a daunting task, and also because I know I'm not particularly gifted with children. But when I was holding Shana yesterday for a good ten minutes, I wondered what I should say to this ten week year-old baby. I knew her body hadn't developed biologically to comprehend everything people said to her or around her, but I just felt like every little thing could leave a mark in her future perceptions. If I could let my child know ONE thing, what would it be? Mommy loves you?Jesus loves you? You're sooo cute? I think about the things from my childhood that affected my perceptions o

I love unexpected blessings that result from a detour. The original plan: To dine at Zingerman's Roadhouse for the first time, with a dear friend whose days in town are counting down (going to the Roadhouse was one of the things on her bucket list). What actually ended up happening: Catching-up, worshiping, and praying OUTSIDE while enjoying God's gifts! Lisa and I had been planning this for a while now and I was super stoked about having this one-on-one time with her. The detour came when she began telling this long story about how the HS challenged her to fast for pre-christians in her life. I've never understood the hype about Zingerman's (gah whoever's reading this, please don't kill me) and frankly never thought it was worth the price tag or wait time. Despite me having communicated this, Lisa was SUPER apologetic about not being able to follow through on our original plan. We ended up picking up some drinks from Panera and heading over to the Diag to cat

I've never read the entire bible. When I first made the decision to make Jesus my lord and savior, it was unsurprising that I had never read the entire bible before. In fact, my knowledge of the old testament was so abysmal that one summer when I was planning for bible story lessons for kids (csmp), I had to secretly read summaries of common stories taught to kids while my teammates who grew up going to Sunday school easily recalled characters from the ot. I was so embarrassed that I had no idea who these prominent characters from the ot were, such as Ruth/Naomi, Joseph & his brothers, Jonah, king David, and the like. But knowing I had only began my relationship with God two years prior, I had somewhat of a. "safety net" to excuse myself. Today, more than four years have passed and I have yet to know the entire history of God moving powerfully amongst people before Christ. Here I am trying to teach the fifteen college students in my lifegroup how to value the wor

I will never forget the first day I walked into my soon-to-be workplace for my final round of interviews. Despite being located in one of the more prominent centers in Detroit, when I got off the elevator and opened the door, I was greeted by a dim and narrow atmosphere with high-walled cubicles. Half of the desks on the floors were unoccupied, and I couldn't imagine spending more than forty hours there every week. Having worked in an ad agency a few years prior where there was not a single item of furniture in grayscale colors and the fridges were stocked with beer, I could immediately sense how much more formal and professional the culture was than at Leo Burnett. ANYWAY, all of that changed a few months ago when I found out that we would be moving! Today our office leader invited us to an open house at the new tower, and presented details about the new facilities. The major change is that the new workplace emphasizes openness and collaboration, through the plentiful amounts of n

One of my favorite parts about working at Deloitte is the ways we are involved in local communities. Similar to DP Day that the University of Michigan participates in once a year, Deloitte has IMPACT Day, where the entire firm puts our regular responsibilities on pause for one day to participate in skills-based volunteering. Throughout the year, we partner with a few select organizations like United Way, City Year, and College Summit to serve as mentors, teachers, and counselors (among other things). It's funny that I express such enthusiasm now because all throughout high school and college, I greatly undermined the value of community service. Maybe it's because I grew up in a rather homogeneous suburban neighborhood, but I didn't see the power of mentorship relationships until two summers ago when I got to interact with the underachieving youth at Cesar Chavez Academy in Southwest Detroit. Since then, I've been learning more about different social issues and how I ca

I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna miss Wed night chapel times. Every Wed night, I meet with a couple people to pray for our lifegroup. Tonight as one of the members were closing out, he mentioned how thankful he was for the relationships that were built this year, and prayed that the accountability relationships would continue through the summer and beyond. It wasn't anything new, but that kind of specific prayer just didn't cross my mind for some reason. I couldn't help but giggle inside with excitement, as I thought about all the relationships that flourished AFTER a life group ended. Eight months is just too short of a time for a relationship to be built then ended. So many relationships flourished and went to deeper levels in the months and years following an "official" time period, which makes me feel a little less sad about this lifegroup coming to a close. The school year might be over, but the relationships last forever. Another reason w

If you've been around me long enough, you probably know how much I love good deals. I've been an avid follower of Dealnews and Spoofee for years, and this year I started sharing the good news of Groupon and Livingsocial with more passion than I evangelize about Jesus. A few weeks ago I publicized on my facebook about a local skydiving deal, encouraging "anyone whose life bucket list includes skydiving to take this chance" and purchase the deal. I didn't understand the power of social media until a friend walked up to me the next day and told me that after seeing my "exhortation", he and fifteen of his friends purchased the deal together and will all be jumping out of a plane in September. I was in shock but also stunned--what if I shared about Jesus with such passion and enthusiasm?? Would fifteen others buy the product I'm selling with just as much excitement?? What if I shamelessly and convincingly "sold" Jesus on my facebook? Yesterda

With the school year and season of church ministry coming to a close, I have been thinking about what to expect in the coming months. Not much will change in my own life as I will continue to work in Detroit and live in Ann Arbor, but for many of the people around me things WILL look drastically different, whether it be moving to another city or taking on different responsibilities where they currently are. While other people's decisions don't alter my desire to invest in college students lives, in complete frankness, I can foresee feelings of loneliness creeping in already. Yesterday the women in our church wrapped up our study on some common "lies women believe in (and the truths that set us free)". I didn't expect the three sessions to be a silver bullet (end-all-solution) to all my problems, but one thing I walked away with is the need for me to dispel every lie in my mind with a DIRECT, corresponding truth from the Bible. Recently whenever I give a personal u

A few months ago during a church-wide fast, I was convicted to pray more specific prayers. One of the specific prayers I lifted up was for two new members to join the publications team. To my complete surprise, that prayer was actually fulfilled. Two sophomores, Julia and Mathew, began serving in our church for the first time. As thrilled and blown-away I was to see God answer a prayer I lifted up so faithlessly, a myriad of fears and questions started creeping in. How would having two new members affect our ministry team? For quite a while now, the publications team was composed of a handful of very committed people who wholeheartedly agreed with the mission and vision of HMCC--in other words, my entire team was composed of old people who had been around our church for many years (ie: our two youngest team members were college seniors O_O). Everyone was "on the same page", which allowed our times of sharing to be very open and honest, without fears of judgment or having to u

I don't have many regrets in life, but one of them is regarding the relationship I have with my family. I grew up most of my life in NJ with mom, dad, and brother, but things started changing my junior year in high school. My older brother moved to Pittsburgh for college, my dad got transferred back to the office in Korea, and I ended up living with my mom for a little less than two years. I think the time was particularly hard for my mom, but I (being the immature and self-absorbed student I was) personally wasn't that affected by the sudden disbursement of my immediate family. My mom ended up moving to Korea to be with my dad the moment I finished high school, and I transitioned to life in Michigan. During the breaks is when I realized I didn't know where I belonged anymore--I would go "home" to Korea once or twice a year, thinking of NJ or MI as where I really belonged. Over my four years in college as I started investing more in my relationship with God, one o