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I got held back

When I first made the decision to stay here after I graduated, I thought I was doing something noble. Even though it wasn't an easy decision, I thought I was doing God some favor.

It wasn't until 2012 when I went to Indonesia for a week-long medical missions trip that I realized: I'm actually not that great. I felt so insecure coming back to the US to say that it took $2400 of financial support, 36 hours of travel time, and a trip to the other side of the world JUST for me to realize that; but it was SO needed for me to finally bend my knee in utter brokenness.

Coming back, I received this new perspective that the REAL reason why I had been asked to stay was more similar to the concept of remedial education. I was too stubborn, closed-off, and resistant to Jesus during my four years in undergrad, so I had to be held back.

I'm so thankful I didn't just "do what I want" and leave, because I would have missed out on SO MANY lessons on integrity, relationships, and ministry.

From today's BS on 1 Corinthians 6:
I have no right to just "do what I want" because I am not my own; I was bought at a price.

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