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The hardest of hearts

God can change even the hardest of hearts.

For weeks, I was in denial. I wrestled with God and didn't want it to be true. I didn't pray because I knew what I was supposed to do, but didn't want to hear what He wanted to say. (FYI: Intentionally not praying when you need to make decisions is just about the dumbest thing you can do). To be completely honest, I secretly hoped that my parents would refuse to sign the consent form (messed up, I know). If anything, through this painful decision-making process, I realized how messed up and manipulative I could be..

Even when I refused and turned away, I knew deep inside what to do. Not the dream internship that I had worked towards, but what I really desired for the coming summer was to learn to love Jesus more and experience His love for me more--so much that I would no longer need to rely on the securities of this world--not a dream job, nor approval from my peers. I'm trusting and believing with (oh so little) faith that even without taking an internship this summer, God will provide another opportunity if He really desires for me to be a Brand Manager.

So when things get difficult and I start doubting if I made the right decision, remember that no matter how much I think my way would have been better, only the Lord gives the right answer and I KNOW what the right answer is (Proverbs 16:1). Stop being foolish and being in denial. Let go for once and let Him take over.

Here's to Your future (not mine)

-NY

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