Live Out Loud

Whenever friends would ask about what kind of partner I'm looking for, I would recite a short list of non-negotiable's and a medium list of nice-to-have's. I never minded sharing my non-negotiable's (shared values, spiritual maturity, someone who enjoys their work but doesn't find their worth in it), but I felt shy about my nice-to-have's or personal preferences. Who was I to be so picky or particular, especially if they weren't "important" enough to be deal-breakers? Recent interactions have had me re-evaluating the weight of qualities that I had not thought much about before. For example, I never thought that I valued a common enjoyment of food, until I met someone who admitted he "eats to live" (vs. me, who clearly lives to eat). Even though I had previously noted this as merely a preference, I realized I had unsaid expectations of how I envisioned my life and ministry. It would be a pity to not have someone share the joys of eat...

I never identified much as the "courageous" type. When a colleague commented to me on Friday that she thought I was courageous, I was prompted to re-evaluate what I thought courage was. The next day as I was reading Malcolm Gladwell's book, I stumbled across a portion that revealed a lot about my (incomplete) view of courage. Here is a snippet  from Gladwell's book titled  David & Goliath, p 149: "The conquering of fear produces exhilaration. The contrast between the previous apprehension and the present relief and feeling of security promotes a self-confidence that is the very father and mother of courage. Courage is not something that you already have that makes you brave when the tough times start. Courage is what you earn when you've been through the tough times and you discover they aren't so tough after all." I don't think taking the uncommon path is easy for anyone, but there are people who are overwhelmed by the fe...